One of the many emotions I have been dealing with lately is anger.
I am angry at God, because I don't understand why it is Oliver...
I am angry at myself because I feel as if I SHOULD not be angry at God.
I am angry that this is my life right now.
I am angry at people that act like Oliver is already dead.
I am angry at people that act like I've fallen off the face of the planet.
I am angry that I feel like withdrawing from the world because of the hurt that I've felt.
I am angry because of my trials.
I am angry at myself because I should be grateful for my trials.
I am angry that Eden feels like no one cares about her.
I am angry that if Oliver passes, his 1 year old brother may never truly know how much he loved him.
I am angry that this is changing who I am.
I am angry that this is changing who my children are.
I am angry that I have a mental illness on top of this.
I am angry that people don't realize how horrific this is.
I am angry that I can't just shake it off or smile it away.
I am angry when people judge me and think they know what is going on in my life.
I am angry when people say they care and don't call or talk to me in person.
I am angry at this disease that is killing children and no one seems to care.
I am angry that there is no cure for this disease.
I am angry that more children have just passed. Three within 24 hours of one another and I just heard that two more kids passed. These aren't just faces you see on the TV. These families can't just turn the channel. These are our BABIES.
Today I am angry.